Sunday afternoon was bright and sunny as we gathered together in the cool comfort of Visionway Christian School gymnasium to hear from Stacey Skrysak on Living with Loss. Stacey is a well known author, speaker, and award winning journalist in Central Illinois. We were able to walk with her through the joys and sorrows as she shared her story and journey of infertility and the premature birth of her invitro triplets. Stacey not only struggled for her life, but also had to navigate learning how to survive when two of her triplets did not. Along with that emotional and physical struggle, their lone surviving triplet, Peyton, battled several health issues in the NICU. Please check out Stacey’s website to learn more about her journey and how she and her family have learned to live with loss.

We were also able to hear from representatives of a local group who specialize in walking beside those who have lost a loved one or are struggling to navigate life amidst hardship. This group, known as Stephen Ministry, are supported through the Taylorville First United Methodist Church. They offer confidential “high quality, one-to-one Christian care to people going through tough times”. These life experiences may include “grief, divorce, job loss, chronic or terminal illness, or some other life crisis”. This is a great resource for our community. Please click the link to learn more.

New board member, Michelle Knepler shared with us how grief, though it has several stages (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance), is experienced in a non-linear fashion and these stages may hit with different levels of intensity at any given moment following the days, weeks, months or even years following the loss of a loved one. Grief is like a tangled mess of yarn, material, or knotted thread. However, when allowed to be examined and experienced with care and concern this seeming mess may become something that is useful or even purposeful (such as a knitted sweater, a woven hot pad, or beautifully embroidered table cover). The ugly tangled mess of grief is not the end result of the journey, though at times it feels very much like it. Having the support and understanding of people around you (like family members, close friends, Stephen Ministers, counselors, or others who have experienced similar loss), who will walk through each stage, can help you navigate this unintended journey on which you may find find yourself or someone you love. Walking beside someone through grief, or allowing someone to walk beside you, is a huge help. As is having the freedom to ask the unanswerable questions such as “why” or “how could this happen to me or our family”. No answers are really necessary. Just the freedom to voice the question and to be understood in the moment of confusion, hurt, and loneliness is often beneficial.

Please reach out if you or someone you love needs help.

Email: hopehouseofcentralillinois@yahoo.com Phone: 217-777-HOPE (4673) Stephen Ministries Phone: Pastor Becky – 217-823-5478, Gary – 217-820-9518, Craig – 217-820-7714 Decatur Psychological Associates – 217-827-1700 Living Hope Counseling Center – 217-698-7150 National Alliance for Children’s Grief – 1-866-432-1542 National Alliance on Mental Health – Crisis? text NAMI to 741741 or call 1-800-950-6264